It’s complicated
Relationships have never been better
defined by words than these two – It’s complicated. The more we try to
understand them, the more complex they become. Many a time, we tend to think
that relationships evolve by themselves. This is rarely true. They need and
want to be nurtured.
Strangely, it is the little things
which help relations flourish. I still remember one of my uncles taking an
effort to find me a job post engineering when no one else bothered. It did not
work out. But I am still grateful for the effort he took. I am sure all of you
have little things which you remember people by. It doesn’t take much time and
more often than not, not much effort too. But one has to have the heart to do
it. This doesn’t come by easily. One has to cultivate that habit.
In our part of the world at least, relationships
play a huge role. Be it family, friends or acquaintances, having a ‘connect’
with someone is valued more than anything else. Then the decisions are made by
the heart and not the head. I remember once, under a situation of immense
pressure, I called up a colleague for something quite late in the night. He
told me that I am doing this since YOU are asking me. Otherwise, I need not and
will not do it. I would say one of my greatest learnings from working for the
little time that I have done is that it is people who get things done and not processes.
So if you need to get things done in a work environment, you need to connect
with people and it doesn’t happen in a day or two. One needs to build
relationships. Only then people will at least try to go an extra mile for you.
It is quite easy to let
relationships fade away. But getting them back is not quite as easy. More so,in
today’s time and age where we are under a sort of siege by technology.
Relationships begin and end between the time one logs in and logs out.I think the way we seek out relationships also changes with age. Early in life, we seek out similar people- people who are like us because there in lies happiness. Later on, we should try and seek out people who are different from us for they will help us grow as an individual.
Recently, one of my friends told me
that we haven’t met in a long time. I told her that we have been always in
touch through Facebook. She laughed and asked “Since when did that become your
idea of meeting?” One fallacy that we commit these days is in thinking that
virtual interactions are as effective as meeting people in person. This is far
from truth of the matter. When you meet a person, they are able to see your
eyes lighting up seeing them, they understand your genuineness through your
physical gestures and touch. They realize you travelled all the way to be in
their presence.
Relationships need time. It is like
water to a plant. By spending time with each other, one learns more of the other.
We must understand that companionship is one the greatest comforts. There are
times one needs to be alone. But there are also times when one needs to be with
people. And more often than not, the latter need happens more frequently. It
can be family, friends or neighbors. But these relationships don’t happen in a
moment. It might take a lifetime but these are what makes living a lifetime
worthwhile.
Arun Babu.
The virtual connections do not compensate the joy and thrill of meeting a friend/relative face to face. I enjoy the ambience of sharing a cup of tea/coffee while conversation flows. The eyes , ears and heart play an important role in this meeting.
ReplyDeleteVery truly said Kaplana...even I love sharing a cup of tea and chatting away :)
Delete