Words left hanging : Blog #137

Words left hanging

        A couple of days back, I heard my dad lamenting to my mom that he pinged my sister on 'Whatsapp' and she did not reply. My mom dismissed it asking him to not ping her and call her up instead. What was surprising was that I did not find it unusual at all. The not replying part I mean and my dad found it to be unacceptable.

           There used to be a time when not acknowledging a person was considered very rude. Not anymore! Even if two people didn't get along well, in the name of being civil, people used to give some sort of response to the other person.  Cut to the present, we leave the words hanging even between friends and what is surprising is that it is socially acceptable!

            I think it all started with the seemingly harmless missed calls. The land lines never gave an option for us to postpone our responses. The reply had to be given in real time and hence was more sincere J. Then came along the missed calls! Though initially it was a means to know as to who called and return the call, it slowly manifested in to a means where people started buying time. If one didn't want to take a call at a particular time, the person will not attend the call and later, calls back and says “Oh I just saw you missed call!”J.

            Later on manifested, the more mischievous mobile messages. They were even lesser intrusive. The attention that it sought was limited to a beep as compared to the demanding ringing of a missed call. The time taken to elicit a reply for a text message varies from as less as a few minutes to days together! This was the beginning of avoided responses. Messages started going unanswered.

            As we walked further on the path of technology and gadgets, came along Apps and was invented group chats. Here, it is like a usual social gathering minus all the conventional civil norms. A conversation is going on. Anyone can leave unannounced and walk in without as much as a knock. You need not answer all the questions posed to you neither should you bother about the pleasantries. The words are left hanging and it’s just fine. And thanks to the clutter that happens when many people are engaged in a group chat, strings of conversation goes unanswered altogether with the pull down of a scroll button.

            Look at the social media scene. How many of us make an effort to give a personal reply for the birthday wishes that we get? All it takes is half an hour at the max of your dedicated time. But we limit it to a “Thanks everyone for the wishes!”. Try doing that in your circle of friends during the birthday party, at your own risk J .There are comments which go unanswered. ‘Mentions’ and ‘tags’ which go unacknowledged.

            It is not about maintaining the perfect social media etiquette. What we should be concerned about is as to where is all this clutter leading us to? To a world where you look at people and not see them; hear out people and not listen; or even more worrying, speak to someone and go unheard?

Arun Babu.

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