Independent Much? : Blog # 236

Independent Much?

In a country tucked away in a vast desert, rulers can get away with almost anything. They have decided that a woman cannot move around if she is not accompanied by a man. Further to this, the man should be a relative. These kind of restrictions are there in each and every decision concerning a woman – be it her education, work, marriage or life at large.

In another country ravaged by war, people are not allowed to watch movies or hear music. The reasoning here is that enjoyment is a sin. It is not prescribed in the religious text to have a life. And who makes this decision for them? A group of people who wields not religious text books, but guns and grenades.

There are places in our world where speaking of a religion other than one which the particular country endorses can be blasphemous. One can face stringent punishments, as grave as death. So the logic is the moment you step inside the imaginary border line of my part of the world, your beliefs become wrong. If you keep your feet just outside the imaginary borderline of my country, your beliefs are right.

Now, what is the reasoning behind all these laws?? There are many absurd reasons. But I feel the reason why many of these rules are still in existence is because almost always a smaller population is affected by these decisions. The larger population feels since it doesn’t affect us, let it be. In some cases, it works in their favor. So be it then! No discussion needed. In some cases, the affected population might be of considerable size. But they are not influential enough to impact a decision.

We all agree that the above restrictions doesn’t make any sense. I mean how on earth can you put such restrictions on women! Isn’t that undermining their value and contribution towards our society? How can you tell people not to watch films and listen to music? Who are you to take that decision for others? Don’t even let me begin with the religious aspects. There are very few things in this world which are as absurd as saying you should find your God through my way!

          But many a time, we lose perspective and objectivity when it is about matters concerning ourselves. Is that the reason why now when I mention Beef ban and porn ban here, some of you at least will start justifying it?

Is Friendship over rated? : Blog # 235

Is Friendship over rated?

The other day, one of my cousins called up. We were chatting about random things. Some relatives bashing later, the topic of impending friendship day came in. He was reminiscing about how important this day was during our school and college days. How we used to wait to wish our friends and some friends-to-be! We were looking at how it has become less of an occasion and celebration these days due to our work and lesser chances to meet up. Then he said something which got me thinking. He said “I think friendship is overrated!”He said very few of those relationships last long. So what is the whole point?

I couldn’t wrap my mind around that thought. It is true that not all friendships last a lifetime. Many a time, we remain friends with people for a very short time – may be for a year, may be throughout school or through college. Later on, some of us do try to keep in touch. Then when the chores of living slowly begin to take the spirit out of life, friendship and being in touch takes a back seat.

But think about this. If those people were not there in those times of your life, how bland life would have been! The moments of goofiness, happiness and of course the little mindless fights are what made our lives so memorable. Today, when I think of School life, about 5-6 faces come to my mind. They are the ones whom I was close to. The other faces have faded away. Like they say, it is not the days that we will remember later on. It is the moments which will bring a smile to our faces. Likewise, we might not remember everyone who walks in to our lives. Only those few whom we let in to our minds and the select few who walk in despite not being invited are the ones will enrich our lives.

These days, it is very easy to begin a friendship, thanks to Social media. All it takes is a click. The boon of today’s times is that and so is the bane. We are connected to so many people at a time that it becomes a bit difficult to sustain those relationships. The mistake that we all do is in confusing the virtual acquaintances with real friends.  Many of us become like a lost kid in a Hamley’s shop. We must understand who the ones whom we really care about are. More importantly, who are the ones who really care about us! It is great to have many friends. But in the haste to enlarge our friends circle, one shouldn’t overlook the existing friendship.

What a good friend does is that he/she helps widen one’s perspective; broaden one’s horizons, enhances one’s knowledge about life and grows one’s ability to love by leaps and bounds.  I am blessed to have such people in my life. Thank you all. Happy friendship day!

Arun Babu