The dreaded 10 Questions! : Blog # 170

The dreaded 10 Questions!

        Let me start off this post with a pre- emptive bail. This post might turn out to be a bit of hypocrisy. The reason being the questions that I am going to list down is what I ask for earning my brown bread and whipped butterJ. These are the thoughts which run through a recruiter’s mind when they ask you these questions!

How are you doing?

When a candidate walks in, I wish him/her. Then they ask me the question listed above. I tell them “I am good. How are you?”. Then they go “I am good too. How are you?” Then I am like “Dude, that’s what I said in the beginning. I am GOOD! This is an interview. Pay attention.” (of course in my mind!)

Are you nervous?

I usually ask this question when a candidate make the first question in to an unending loop. Most of them say that they are not nervous. But there was one person who asked me “Are you?”. I thought in my head “Why the hell would I be nervous? You are the one who needs a job!”

Tell me about yourself

Now this one is hated by both the people sitting across the table. The recruiter hates it because of 2 reasons. One, most people have no clue who they are. Two, some people just wouldn’t stop when asked this question.  Things like the pet dog’s name and your pet name aren’t exactly the things we are looking for in the answer!

What are your strengths and weaknesses?

For the love of God, everyone can’t be Amir Khan. Being a perfectionist cannot be everyone’s weakness! Yeah, you read that right. People list it as their weakness! And strength, “I am a good team player”. Ok then I say, tell me about your team. “Oh don’t ask me. There is too much of politics to the extent that even I have stopped working properly!”. There goes our candidate’s “strength”!

Where do you find yourself five years from now?

Some go on to say “I will be a Vice President in your company and in worst cases, CEO of your company!”. In my head, I am thinking; for heaven’s sake, give me a break and God save my company if you become the CEO!

Are you happy in your current job?

There are people who go on to bitch about their current company to the

extent that makes me cringe. I am thinking what is the guarantee that you won’t do the same to my company in your next interview?

You think you will be happy in your new job if you get it?

Yes, I will be extremely happy. I will be the happiest person on earth. I am thinking dude this is not an interview for Disney world!

What is your salary expectation?

This one is particularly hilarious. There are people who ask for 100%-200% hike. I have half a mind to tell them that you seriously think you will be paid more than your second level manager???

How long will you stay with my company?

“I will not leave this company, ever! This is my dream company.” Yeah right! This is the reason why you have not stayed with the last 3 companies for more than 3 years!

 When can I know the result?

Now, here I am turning the table a bit. This question is usually asked to the interviewer.  The interviewer goes “We shall get back to you in two weeks time”. The interviewee asks does that mean I am selected?. We go “The status will be informed to you in two weeks time.” But you can tell me if I am selected or not right? In some cases,I want to scream“It is considered in appropriate to tell a person that you have failed miserably in the interview and with your credentials, I don’t see you clearing any interview for a very very long time”(of course in my mind).

So the next time you go for an interview,forget about these tried and tired answers.Be yourself. Believe me, it's refreshingly relieving for both people sitting across the table :)

This post is written for Indispire                                                                                                                                                                    

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